|  Ishq
Hai Tumse Movie Review
Making movies is a challenge. It is not easy to research
the plot, verify the information and develop a strong
message, all in a matter of a few days. That is exactly
the reason no one does it. It can be tough to look for
scripts of inspiration. Is there enough muck in the
world everyday to make movies about? Fortunately, since
we still have Dino and Bipasha, we don't have to worry
too (two) much (muck).
Accordingly, they've found a grave script
for them - say, more grave than discussing the fact:
Why is there a sign in theaters saying, "In case
of fire, please do not use the elevator"? I mean,
regarding stupidity, this must've been the forefather
of all stupidity. Of course, everyone knows in case
of fire you don't use an elevator - in case of fire,
you use a fire extinguisher!
We shall shelve that for a moment to
discuss the original topic of the thread: Bipasha and
Dino. All the digression in the world will not let you
forget the impressions they make on your mind. You won't
forget, since they didn't make any impression to remember.
Of course, that doesn't include that bathing suit Bipasha
so subtly displayed while blinking her eyes ever so
rapidly.
Bips and Dino are the corresponding
daughter and son of two very thick friends. Vikram Gokhle
is Dino's dad, and Aloknath, Bipasha's. Alok is a Lucknow
Nawab and Vikram, a Mumbai Pandit. They've been the
best of friends since the day they decided to make the
movie. And the way they behave, you'd bet your last
penny they're even closer after the film.
So when Dino and Bips proclaim their
fondness for each other by rubbing their bodies against
each other and all the trees in the neighbourhood, we
know that all is not going to be fine soon. But instead
of diagnosing them for Rabies, the fathers actually
decide to exchange body organs. Queer treatment, we
know.
Actually, during a wedding in the family
(don't ask which family - both these families make the
schmucks in Hum Apke Hain Kaun seem sober), Vikram (Dino's
dad) has a kidney failure. Alok comes to the rescue
and donates his. And this how their conversation in
the hospital sounds like:
Vikram: Hum dono ke beech yeh kya hai
nawab? Tune yeh kya kar diya? (Pointing to his posterior)
Alok: Yeh sab kudrat ka khel hai pundit. Jo sab bhi
mera hai woh ab tera. (Smiling gingerly)
Vikram: Hum dono ke beech ab kabhie daraar nahin hoga
mere yaar!
Alok: Mein aane nahin doonga, kabhi nahi.
While this was happening, Dino is satisfying
his voyeuristic desires by eavesdropping on them. So,
he somehow decides that if he tells people that he loves
Bipasha's brea... er, breathtaking personality, then
their dads might have a rift in their "friendship".
So he keeps mum. Like he's been doing throughout, anyway.
But as the laws of short-skirts and
big biceps go, Alok finds out about his daughter's hidden
"feelings". He then orchestrates a heart-attack
scene to get it all sorted out. Which gives Vikram to
again barge in a few "friendship" lines. "Nawab,
yeh kya ho gaya? Tere dil ko kuch ho gaya tho mera dil
tho tera hi hai na!"
So there - Bips and Dino get together.
Frankly, as you can see, the only true story is about
two great "friends" and their organ exchange
frenzy. The love story looks like an afterthought. Anyway,
even if it were the main plot, Dino and Bips would make
it seem like a puppet show.
No script, no performances, no music,
no fun. Ishq Hai Tumse isn't much about Bips and Dino.
It's about a flop remake of our Tollywood's Sampangi.
It's about grown-up dads saying with moist eyes: "Ishq
Hai Tumse". So, you game enough? |
